And this is why you’re dead to me a.k.a. Why we’re not nice when people who should know better are stupid

17 Jun

We here at The Dog Snobs are pretty easy going peeps, admittedly some of us much more so than others.

There are other types?

There are other types?

We’re usually willing to help our newbie friends and we appreciate being given help ourselves as necessary. I know, shockingly TDS needs help too sometimes. We’re not actually omniscient, though Wiikipedia and Google let us do a fair impression of it most of the time. In our quest for knowledge, we ourselves hold each other to high standards and we hate to break it to you minions, but we will hold you to them too.


Maybe not that many more… but some


Recently there has been a spate of puppy acquisitions among the various tribes through Facebook. Either summer boredom, puppy jealousy or a cheap ad on Craigslist has made a new puppy The Accessory for 2014.

Accessories! Not just for reindeer.

Accessories! Not just for reindeer.

Fang and Potnoodle are not immune to this trend, Fang has herself acquired a puppy and Potnoodle has been alternating between search mode and despair for several months. These acquisitions however fall within the rubric of appropriate snobby conduct. Below we’ve compiled a, shall we say, a behavioral chart, to guide you in your quest.


1) If you’re reading this you should know better than to need this. 

Figuratively everywhere

Figuratively everywhere

Those little red flags flapping like mad in the distance? Yeah, don’t ignore those. Something sketchy about the breeder? Questionably legal practices taking place? What on earth is a good reason to carry forward? Pro-tip kids, a “deposit” is almost always refundable in full or if you’re nice, in part. In fact pretty much all puppy contracts aren’t worth the paper they’re written on.


We’re glad your puppy was cute and sweet and you just had to have him, but you, ex-minion are a part of the problem. In fact, you pretty much are the problem. Good breeders aren’t churning out dogs to be dumped in shelters, the bad ones are, and congrats, you just bankrolled another litter.

2) People telling you to walk away aren’t doing it to ruin your life.

Yes, I'm sure you matter... *pat pat pat*

Yes, I’m sure you matter… *pat pat pat*

If strangers with no vested interest in your life, and little breeder contact warning you off a breeder…  it’s probably for a good reason. If red flags have popped up for numerous other people, it’s probably time to think about the choice you’re making.It’s likely not a good one. An important thing to remember in dogs is that the more you think you know, the more you have to learn and that applies to this too. It’s always a good idea to have a pair of objective eyes look at a breeder before you make a final decision.


3) If you can’t say anything nice, come sit by us.

Standard honest is pretty good too.

Tacit approval? Yeah, never going to happen. If you want a cheering section rather than honest feedback, may we suggest the lyrical stylings of youtube.


Seriously, if you think everyone on the internet is going to make nice and tell you to go right ahead with your bad life choices…. well, welcome to the internet. No one is nice and be careful what you google.


4) Disagreement with you doesn’t make everyone else an asshole


If you want to make a stupid decision, more power to you. We’ll just put it on your list of other stupid decisions. We have a chart. It’s color-coded so, super-fun.


Have I mentioned that Potnoodle rode my ass about getting a puppy? Well she did. And honestly? I appreciate it in a friend. Out of the blue I announce I’m getting a puppy and any sane person is going to have some questions. We’re biffles and all, and homegirl knows I am an expert skeptic, but as my friend, she did some checking as well. Totally unnecessary checking, but I appreciate her interest in making sure I’m not making a horrible decision. When she couldn’t find a few answers, she asked me and thoughtful little munchkin I am, I had already asked and had answers. Rather than getting annoyed (My default setting) I adopted the ever present (Okay not ever but more often present than not) ‘Attitude of Gratitude’. I appreciate the effort my friends put forth for my well-being. Why on earth would I bitch about that?


My heart is full.

My heart is full.



In retrospect, I don’t think I rode her ass. I just wanted to make sure she wasn’t making a hasty decision. A breeder isn’t something you can pick in one night. For one thing, a lot of the good ones have wait lists. They generally want to get to know you as much as you should want to get to know them. This is not Burger King, you don’t drive up to the window and get a nicely packaged puppy with all the condiments you ordered. Occasionally, the perfect puppy will fall in your lap suddenly but that’s one gift horse you DO need to look in the mouth.

No listen to the horse! Look! Look hard!

No listen to the horse! Look! Look hard!


So here’s the deal guys. you can make all the stupid decisions you want but throwing a fit when other people disapprove is more than a little ridiculous. Either grow a thicker skin, or use some of that hindsight everyone else is so fond of to maybe think over what you’re doing.

17 Responses to “And this is why you’re dead to me a.k.a. Why we’re not nice when people who should know better are stupid”

  1. paigeandspaniels June 17, 2014 at 2:30 am #

    Amazingly I was just talking to someone who said “So what I got my dog off Craigslist? Was I supposed to just wait until someone worse than me bought it or it ended up at the shelter?”

    • houndsofgrey June 17, 2014 at 3:29 pm #

      “Yes, that’s exactly what you should have done. You should have chosen that YOUR money would not be used to fund the activities of this questionable person.”

      This is like trying to argue that it’s actually great to buy drugs off skeevy street dealers because if you don’t, someone else will and that person might overdose or commit a violent crime under the influence. And just try that excuse with the cops 😛

      • paigeandspaniels June 17, 2014 at 3:32 pm #

        My response was basically puppies are supply and demand. The $300 for that BYB border collie mix with no shots just funded another litter.

        Paying an adoption fee is funding the shelter/rescue to allow other dogs to be brought in.

        I just don’t understand how people don’t realize it. Well— I do, they see a pair of blue eyes and fluffy tail and figure out how to justify it.

  2. dachshundnola June 17, 2014 at 3:13 am #

    Wow. Aren’t you just a mature bunch?

    • Aerial June 17, 2014 at 3:27 am #

      And the award for Most Obvious Offender goes to….

      • Kitten June 17, 2014 at 11:28 am #

        **golf clap**

  3. Cheryl June 17, 2014 at 4:13 am #

    Quote (overheard) from hairdresser at salon, “He paid $500 for the puppy a pitbull/black lab mix. And yes, that is a breed now.” Ugh………..

  4. Christine Vezina June 17, 2014 at 11:22 am #

    My favorite part is afterward, when it all goes downhill and they decide they want you to help them sue the breeder.

    Also, point #4 is not bold, and it’s upsetting my OCD. A lot. IS THE COLOR CODING A LIE TOO? GAH! *frowny face*

  5. 25castleson25clouds June 17, 2014 at 12:56 pm #

    I love that you have a colour coded chart – all good charts are colour coded!!!

  6. Kara June 17, 2014 at 1:26 pm #

    “I know you’re picky about where you get your dogs—but I found a guy out near the airport who only charges $300 for a puppy. I don’t need anything fancy.”


    • Jennifer June 17, 2014 at 2:11 pm #

      “Oh, honey, we just got her from the WalMart parking lot for $150. She’s got all the same fancy papers as your dog does (so does not), and we love her more than you do.”

      This puppy is now relegated to a kennel in the back yard.

    • Kris June 18, 2014 at 8:35 pm #

      Just got booted off a Rottweiler group on facebook for calling a backyard breeder *gasp* a back yard breeder.
      Apparently I am a know it all meanie pants. God forbid I point out our breed is 50 shades for fucked up with health problems and that we don’t need more back yard bred Rotties spreading their seed around.
      But oh my dog is German bred so it didn’t come with papers from the guy I got him off of Craigslist from. I pointed out that’s funny since my 11 week old German bred Rottie came with FCI papers and his parents’ KOR info.
      Then I got called an elitist snob.

  7. All Things Collie June 17, 2014 at 4:48 pm #

    Recently, I have had so many people contacting me on Facebook for advice on finding reputable, ethical breeders, and then they don’t listen, and I wonder why I bother. *sigh*

    • TheDogSnobs June 17, 2014 at 4:49 pm #

      I’m mean. If I don’t like them I direct them to the breed club’s breeder referral person. If I really like them, I’ll give them some names of people who aren’t stupid and where they go from there is up to them.

  8. jez2221 June 17, 2014 at 6:01 pm #

    I find that only non dog people are ever blindly happy if you tell them out of the blue that you are getting a puppy. If you are going to spring that on me, you’d best be prepared for 3000 questions. And for the love of doG, don’t post that shit on a fb group FULL of dog people, then get offended.

  9. Christal June 18, 2014 at 6:12 pm #

    I saw a post recently where someone was purchasing a $2500 goldendoodle. Say what? $2500 for a mutt? Is this real life?

    Then, when someone said, “you know that isn’t even a breed right?” His response was if you breed two purebred dogs together you get a purebred dog. I was just like um I think you forgot the part where they have to be the SAME breed! I mean, by that logic, if I take pure sugar and put it in my gas tank full of just gas, I should have a pure substance in my car, not just a jacked up car now, right?

    I just don’t get it. I have five purebred rescues, on of whom is a French Bulldog, and in adoption fees TOTAL for all of them, I paid about $500!

    It just blows my mind.

    Then he asked if his golden could be registered….. I just can’t.

    • Gail F. June 18, 2014 at 8:29 pm #

      $2500 for a goldendoodle? Let me just bang my cyber-head against a cyber-wall. Ick ack. My beautiful, sweet English Cocker cost half that much several years ago; and he was show quality (and his parents were OFA and CERF’d). I’m so sick of the “doodle” craze; I just hope that they’re not flooding shelters and rescue groups (where I live, most of the dogs in shelters seem to be Pit Bulls and Pit Bull “types”/mixes).

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