So you want to start a dog forum fight…

21 Oct

We’ve all seen it.  A seemingly innocent question is asked in a dog forum and then suddenly….MASS CHAOS.  From shaming, to name calling (pro tip:  Please come up with something better than poopyhead if you ever want to be taken seriously.  We suggest assmarmot or shitweasel), to complete psychotic breaks, we’ve seen it all.  If you want to avoid being “that person” who flamed the fire, we suggest avoiding the following topics.  And alternatively, if you are a shit-stirrer like we suspect many of you are, take your pick!

1.Asking what people think of Cesar Millan

Ah, CM, the trolliest topics of all.  Guaranteed for at least 100 comments, 3 personal insults, and at least one mention of Hitler. Proceed with caution.

Truer words were never spoken.


2. Posting a picture of your child riding your dog like a pony.

This never ends well. For bonus rage, mention neighbourhood pony dog races and ask where to buy a custom dog saddle that is lightweight and comfortable.


3. Ask if Kibbles-n-Shits is a good dog food.

People get crazy when it comes to what they feed their dogs.   We’ve literally seen people refer to kibble as ‘death nuggets’ before in forums.  DEATH NUGGETS. We’re pretty sure some of the funniest and most outlandish forum fights stem from what starts as a simple discussion of canine nutrition (or lack thereof).


4. Mention getting a dog anywhere but a reputable breeder or rescue 

Was your breeder reputable? Were they reputable… enough? It doesn’t matter if your breeder has 10 generations of CHIC numbers, All GrCh dogs and titles on the other end too…. someone will bring up SOMETHING. And they’ll judge you for it. To a lesser degree, this happens with rescues too but it’s much more evident in dogs from breeders.

Kid, you don’t know the half of it.


5. Bring up your training style.

Frankly, it doesn’t matter what your training style is.  Some people will love it.  Some will hate it.  Lines will be drawn and a war of words will begin.

I only use organic, free-range clickers



6.  Proclaim your love (or hate) for Doodles.

Do we even have to explain this one? It’ll mostly be Potnoodle yelling at you, but if that’s how you get your jollies, who are we to judge?

Just read our past blogs for evidence.

For another post on the shit-shows that are dog forums, check out our post on the types of people who use dog forums.


34 Responses to “So you want to start a dog forum fight…”

  1. Kara Austin (@cmykara) October 21, 2014 at 2:10 am #

    Oh, #5—the only thing two trainers can agree on is that the third one is doing it wrong.

    • Tammy October 21, 2014 at 2:30 am #

      LOVE IT and so true !!! All for Balance

  2. Lizzie Moir October 21, 2014 at 2:12 am #

    Best line ever: “I only use organic, free-range clickers”
    Bwaaahahaahahaaahaa!!!!! *snorts*

  3. Rebecca October 21, 2014 at 2:32 am #

    Just because I alpha rolled my pure bread pit-doodle when he growled at me over the his bowl of Ol’ Roy doesn’t mean you should judge me.

    • Brenda Beatty October 24, 2014 at 1:54 pm #

      Don’t forget that you think it’s because your didn’t spay/neuter or you did it too early. Not gonna lie, I would probably jump on this conversation lol.

      • Adele Donahue December 23, 2014 at 4:06 pm #

        ugh, just heard my aunt claim her boxer died of cancer because she spayed her too young and did not go through the mandatory 2 heats and 1 pregnancy. And she fed the dog “dog chow”.

  4. Robert Wesner October 21, 2014 at 2:33 am #

    I’ve learned to avoid asking owners where they go for vet care. I really like my vets, but that doesn’t mean everyone else does. It’s very personal. By the way this is the first time I’ve posted here. I really like your site.

  5. Tam October 21, 2014 at 2:37 am #

    You forgot to include working line versus show line breeding 🙂 That will stir the soup pot with a shit covered stick every time 🙂

  6. wkmtca October 21, 2014 at 2:47 am #

    you want a shit storm.. go to an obedience list and mention the advisory committee changes.. mention stays in particular.

    • AC October 21, 2014 at 4:10 am #


    • Mountain Poodle October 21, 2014 at 2:41 pm #


    • Rosemary October 21, 2014 at 7:43 pm #

      That’s not a shit storm. That’s a shit hurricane, typhoon, tornado, nor’easter, and Midwest blizzard, all rolled into one.

  7. Jeannette October 21, 2014 at 3:31 am #

    LOL, I moderate a forum with over 10,000 members and I tell you we constantly deal with this issues. The other big ticket item is tail docking.

  8. maxwellthedog October 21, 2014 at 3:38 am #

    Where does the “people who don’t pick up their dog shit” discussion fit?

  9. workbox October 21, 2014 at 4:43 am #

    Nailed it!!

  10. SarahB October 21, 2014 at 5:59 am #

    The other day, someone didn’t like what I said in a sporting breed’s facebook group so they called my dog fat. My IBIZAN HOUND fat. Not only that, she took several tries to set it up – first replying with, “Is not-the-name-of-my-dog yours?” then “Who is in your profile photo with you?” She also insisted on referring to the breed by its Catalan name, which you never see outside of that region or Wikipedia.
    Everyone ended up ganging up on me after I replied, but I couldn’t hold in the “LOL really?”

    Which brings me to the missing #7. Attack me all you want, but don’t attack my dog.

  11. Dawn Saunders October 21, 2014 at 6:45 am #

    Vaccination is my all time favourite

  12. Sophie October 21, 2014 at 7:05 am #

    Desexing. You’ve gotta have balls to wade into that topic.

    • Nicole October 27, 2014 at 2:47 am #


    • Mel Carlin June 28, 2015 at 3:21 am #

      Or not 😉

  13. Vicki October 21, 2014 at 10:05 am #

    “I only use organic free-range clickers”…. Awesome… but my fave is “shitweasel”. the Dog Snobs rock!

  14. Feral October 21, 2014 at 11:20 am #

    Add spay / neuter debate to that list!

  15. Seabiscuit45 October 21, 2014 at 2:23 pm #

    The one you are missing is breeding (or breading) dogs not worthy of being bred. Granted, they shouldn’t be, but if you want to start a forum war, this is the go-to for a lot of posters.

  16. Mountain Poodle October 21, 2014 at 2:44 pm #

    Oh, oh oh… pick me! Pick me! Rare colors yet disqualifying colors. Think Silver Labs or Merle Poodles.

    • GSDMom October 24, 2014 at 2:13 pm #

      I would like a Merle Poodle.

  17. Joe October 21, 2014 at 4:35 pm #

    Brilliant ! LMAO… 🙂

  18. Annemarie Boller October 21, 2014 at 10:46 pm #

    You forgot to mention, lead or off lead. That starts the fighting every time.

    • karen October 25, 2014 at 3:44 pm #

      Ok, so this person shows up at my gate this morning, the speed limit out there is 30 mph but they do 60 or better, we have had 4 cars in our front yard and and an 18 wheeler, the cops will not do anything about it…so her dog jumps from her window, I told her her dog was going to get hit, as he is running around marking his territory, then she hauls out her second dog “isn’t he cute” yes of course. She gets her dog back in the car instead of rolling up her window, she lets him jump out again! I had to walk away, I didn’t want to see her dog hit, last I saw of him she was letting him chase her down the road! What is wrong with people?

  19. Rachel October 22, 2014 at 3:52 am #

    Don’t forget Pit bulls and anything related to Pit bulls like if DA is a desirable trait or not. That’s where the monthly 20 page arguments are at.

  20. karen shaw October 22, 2014 at 3:55 am #

    Another good one to start a fight is to debark or not to debark your dogs.

  21. Nora October 22, 2014 at 4:18 am #

    1. What should I feed my dog? Because someone ALWAYS starts in about how if you don’t feed raw, you are KILLING your dog. Looking forward to the fight starting here, as a matter of fact.

    2. Unsolicited advice. I made the mistake of posting a picture of my Italian Greyhound a week or so post leg break repair surgery. It was during her supervised couch time, and was just a cute picture. I received a comment about how the leg should be in a cast because you can’t keep them from using it. I responded by telling the poster that the surgeon WANTED her to use it. I got a snarky reply that basically said, well, good luck with that. I deleted the picture rather than get into a war. Gee, who should I listen to–random Internet stranger with SOME leg break experience, or the orthopedic surgeon I just gave $2400 to? The dog in question was cleared to return to normal activity after 6 weeks of crate rest, and has since finished her OAJ, earned a second leg on her OA, finished her USDAA AJ and earned an Advanced Snooker and Starters Gamblers leg (this was approximately 10 weeks after the leg break, about a month after being cleared to return to normal activity). I have since learned that most vets still bandage and cast the leg after plating, and MOST dogs have a much longer recovery time, with frequent vet visits for bandage changes, pressure sores, and reluctance to use the leg after the cast was removed. Yeah, my dog who was never bandaged OR cast is doing TERRIBLY. Can you tell I am still really irritated about this?

    3. Solicited advice. I finally got to the point of “look, call your vet–don’t ask random Internet strangers what you should do about this.” Even if I HAVE experience with what seems to be going on.

  22. J.Scott October 27, 2014 at 8:16 pm #

    “Here is my four week old puppy! Just came home from his responsible breader!”

  23. Kitten October 30, 2014 at 3:58 pm #

    7. Post an opinion about Humane Society of America or better yet, post a meme produced by HSUS.

    Works just as well for ASCPA and PeTA. Fun, fun, FUN!!!

    8. Post an opinion about early spay neuter (pro or con, either way works)

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